WAITING TO FLY

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We all experience times that cause us to reflect and look at ourself with a discerning view and it is usually when we feel alone, lost, abandoned and/or in the dark.
It’s not easy navigating through certain times of our life. It can seem no matter how hard we try, the person we were is no longer able to steer us to where we want to be. Life can seem cruel, uncaring and hurt us at times when we already feel lost and scared looking at our feet.
Sure it can be helpful at times to find gratitude and see what we have that we don’t appreciate but it doesn’t always help and usually when it does it comes to us when we don’t expect it, because no matter how hard we try to be grateful sometimes the pain or loss doesn’t fade.
We have to feel the pain and loss to grow. We need to nurture that part of us that is hurting and not ignore it or look at it as though it’s a pity or a selfish desire to feel sorrow. We can’t always push sorrow away and when things hurt we need to feel the hurt. That ping pong path we may walk between feeling sorry for ourself and trying to find our way is the path that gives us depth and new meaning.

We need to break down the parts of our self esteem, confidence or sense of belonging in the world that is hurting us instead of helping us. That awareness has to come from inside us as it doesn’t matter what anyone tells us on the outside. It’s not until we see it on the inside that we can change it and our pain or struggle brings about that awakening to the part of us we have kept hidden inside us that unknowingly has been hurting us.
We need to realize that are struggle and our pain is there to help us grow in ways we could not with out it.
If we don’t look for an answer in our struggle and look into it to see what it is here to teach us, then we unconsciously ignore it or cover it with something that we want to make us feel better. The pain then will return as it has no choice, because the pain isn’t understood in a conventional sense that we want to think it in. The pain is something that will allow us, if and when we embrace it, to learn from it and become more of what we inherently are. That is the suffering that will set us free.
What we truly are, is what we have always been searching for but cannot see it because of the things we have learned to think, that cause us to search outside us, for something that is inside us. So the pain and suffering of loosing the things we think we are or have, create an awakening inside us that will allow us to fly higher then we ever have before.

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Inspiration

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You know what’s difficult for all of us, whether we lean or stand to the right or the left, is being willing to allow our beliefs to be challenged.

Most of us are unconsciously focused on defending our beliefs. The idea that we don’t have a concrete thought of what we think we are is THOUGHT of as being weak. That idea is in us. That feeling of being broken and a need to fix it.

It’s part of our making. We are broken and in a thought we want to cover that broken or fix it with a thought. We tend to immortalize thoughts by calling them beliefs as though the thought now is not some aberration of mind but instead it’s REAL.

“It’s who I am”. “I” all of a sudden becomes omnipotent because the thought is now a belief and the bedrock that was once my “broken” is now fixed by something that I think.
As “I” holds onto that bedrock belief, it no longer sees itself as broken. Instead it looks at the belief as proof of who it is.
So now the foundation of our brokenness, that hole deep inside us is replaced by our mind. Our mind is never complacent. It constantly needs to think itself because only as it thinks, so it is. And if it thinks it is, then not to think, is the death of itself.

The mind doesn’t want to die. The mind needs to keep thinking in order to survive and it does that by controlling us. So as we continue to think who we are, we continually cover over our broken with a thought we think is who we are. That first thought is smothered and covered with a life time of thoughts as the mind continues to think in order to survive.
The mind lives in fear of losing control and dying, and as it does, we live our life with a false foundation. The initial thought of who we think we are is covered with countless ideas of what we think we are. So we defend those thoughts as though they are who we are. With that concept of thinking, fear is the reason that we defend ourself of anything that challenges our mindset in what we think we are. We defend those thoughts, as we think they are, what we are. That is what separates us from the broken which is our connection to a intelligence beyond our comprehension. The thinking we live in and with, is not who or what we are and the broken we perceive in our perception of who we are is the connection to the one that is before a thought that thinks it is.

The broken is the connection in us to our true self and as we cover the broken with our thoughts, they then give us a false security based on fear. That is how we separate our self from the intelligence or God our creator to the thought of a God we think is but it isn’t. We just think it is.
 So the idea that the truth will set us free isn’t the belief or a thought of knowing God. It’s the willingness to embrace our fear that sets us free and in that letting go
of what we think, a awareness that supersedes anything we can know, will Be.
 Those dominos of thought that separate us from the unbridled intelligence of God can begin to fall and we either spend a lifetime letting them fall one by one and setting us free on a step by step basis or they can all fall at once and as they all fall at once, that is a vision of eternity, the alpha and the omega, the beginning that never ends. The moment that isn’t trapped in time by a thought that thinks it.

That awareness is not a thought, instead, It is because it is, not because some pretense of ego or “I” thinks it is. It is one that is outside a thought. As a thought can not conceive one without another. Being is and because it is we are so it can be.

“Little drops of rain whisper of the pain, tears of loves lost in the days gone by.
My love is strong, with you there is no wrong,
together we shall go until we die. My, my, my.
An inspiration is what you are to me, inspiration, look… see. And so today, my world it smiles, your hand in mine, we walk the miles,
Thanks to you it will be done, for you to me are the only one.

Finding Where I Want “To Be”

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It’s because we want it to be simple is why it’s difficult

If we didn’t care if was difficult then it would be simple

What if we all are finding God in our own way. Then the highs and especially the lows are not what we think they are and it’s not till we stop thinking them that we see what message it is they contain for us.
What if God is not contained in the thought of a name or the thought of a religion. What if God uses the infinity of its intelligence to come to all of us in what ever way we need to understand him in.

What if the differences we find in accepting and rejecting other religions and cultures isn’t a reflection of Gods will but instead the ire of our egos need to think, “I am right and you are wrong”.
What if the idea of right and wrong only lives in our mind and God is outside our mind. Then the idea of a end and beginning, a loss and gain, a birth and death are not a literal concept but rather a figurative one and when you let go of a thought you think something is, then you come to see what was once a finite literal thought in a metaphoric way that transcends life in every way.
What if we looked at religion in a figurative sense and saw how each religion says the same thing in a different way. We then would not have any friends or enemy’s. Everyone would be teaching us in their own understanding of God and we would expand our limited understanding by being open to life instead of limited by what we think.
When will I get, to where I want be?
When I want to be, where I’m at.

Let’s Find A Way

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Sometimes we create a box of understanding and in order to learn something we don’t know or fix something that is broken, we need to think outside the box of understanding we created. As its those walls of thought we live in that create the limitations we perceive.

The world is a land of addiction. Some more glaring then others. Some addictions are not recognized as a addiction because of the thought we define addiction as. It’s looking at what we are ignoring that will allow us to know what we need to know to heal the cause of addiction.
Society is built on a ideal of achievement which can be a plus or a fault depending on how that concept of attaining it is internalized. That process of internalizing a abstract concept of achievement has a identity unique to all . That identity is the making of our freedom or our Hell of addiction.
There are countless tools man uses to discover himself either externally in the world he perceives or internally from the inner domain we see ourselves from. Our consciousness is the connection between the two. Our consciousness is influenced by our subconscious which is the part of us most are out of touch with.
Science, religion, philosophy, spirituality and psychology are some of the tools man uses to rectify or enhance the mysterious subconscious we are a reflection of in our conscious manifestation of life. Some of us see a correlation between the outer world we live in and the inner world we think in. Most however find a disconnect between the the inner and outer world or the external perception of the life we live and the internal thoughts our ego creates. That disconnect is the cause of our addiction. Its the judging of the addiction in others that allows it to survive in us. By judging someone else we ignore the addiction we own. How someone is either praised for their wealth and social status or looked down on for their failures and in ability to meet a social standard of acceptance is the making of what creates a concept of good and bad. That standard of one or the other is the see saw of our own making that addiction thrives on.
The disconnect between the socially accepted addiction and the unacceptable addiction is the making of a society based on winners and losers. In that society their has to be one for there to be the other. As there can not be a winner without a looser and a looser without a winner.
The word addiction is a nebulous word that goes by many acronyms and is either simplified or complicated in defining it. Part of the answer to addiction is letting go of the need to define it and instead look at our subconscious and what influences it today.
We need to take down the walls of thought society has in glorifying or prosecuting the conscious manifestation of addiction that is the result of our thoughts or how we think. That thinking creates the subconscious, which is the transition between the inner world of our being and the external world we manifest in a perception of self.
If we are going to “Fix” society, then we need to fix ourself and in repairing what’s inside us we will experience the same outside us.
So where do we start? How do we take down a wall we create by judgement that we have been living with and thinking it is what we want?
The answer then is the problem. Our thinking has created the world we experience. We are the problem. As long as we continue to judge the outside world for our happiness then we will live in a unending struggle of loss and gain, pain and reward, success and failure, hope and defeat.
Our mind is what needs to be fixed. We cannot use the same mind of good and bad to win the war we have inside and outside us. Addiction is our self made construct of life and it manifests itself in the good and the evil we fear and rejoice in.
We have learned to ignore our connection to a infinite intelligence that creates us, to a finite, limited understanding of what we think, which is based on a ego that lives in fear. So as the ego that lives in fear is the artist of our thinking so our reality is based on a good and bad that survives because of a thought born from a idea that is fear based. We create our existence from the fear we think. That fear is the world we live in. As it is within so it is with out.
Our goal, to become what we already are but cover up with what we think we are, is to let go of our attachment to what we think and embrace what we feel. We need to feel life in us and outside us. To look for compassion in others instead of judgement. To see the hate in the world as a hate we own inside us.
That transformation of looking at the world as a reflection of what we are will bring about a peace we find inside us to witness outside us. We can’t fight for love, freedom or peace. We can only own it in our heart and use that heart to steer us today to create our tomorrow.
So the addiction in me is the the addiction I see in you. My anger at the world I perceive is the place in me I allow to think instead of feel. That thought I can not put down is what is the problem in me and the world.
As I say no to the fear in me and yes to the love I feel. I will then plant the seed that will grow the love we already are instead of some thought we think we need. We will see by not thinking but instead feeling that we already have everything we could ever need.

Echo Of I Am?

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There is nothing more depressing then “honestly” asking yourself if your life has a meaning.

The three pertinent words in that sentence are honestly, your and life. Honestly is simply stating the fact that the question is a question that you internalize instead of gloss over. Does the question run deep or is it a superficial dalliance of thought quickly ushered away by the next thought to enter your mind?

If you choose to walk into yourself and look at it, you begin to question what you have thought. To question it you have to stand on both sides of it, what ever it is. Was “it” meaningful or wasn’t it. To say yes you have to have first said no. By saying no, you looked at no and then said yes. So if you ask yourself if your life has meaning you then say no to every part of your life you thought had meaning and then say yes it has. If you blindly say yes then you never considered the question. You blindly looked at with superficiality and went on to the next thought.

Observing that then, the person who internalizes that question is the one who challenges them self to find more then them self in dalliance of thought. The artist is the depressed that looks to something others don’t and as they do they find a side to them self that isn’t them self. A depth that spawns the creativity that inspires the thought to be what it isn’t and that is seeing past what you think.

“We are who we are, having secretly decided who we want to be” Oscar Wilde

“your” denotes duality. I am observing myself, “does my life have meaning”. Is creating a stage to see it from. Well if that’s true then it is also true that one can not observe one. There has to be two in order for one to observe itself.  One isn’t unless something else observes it. So if “I” decides it is then it has to be because it allows something else to be. I’m playing a part to something.

“A man, to be a artist, of anything, food, what ever. It depends on how good he is at it. Creasy’s art is death. He’s about to paint his masterpiece.” Christopher Walkin. Man On Fire

So if “Life” has meaning it can either have meaning in duality thinking about what things it has done to credit itself. If it doesn’t have duality then the question is about whether “your” life has meaning as in whether life in itself with out duality. Just life and not some thought of it has meaning. It is before, thought, thinks it. It is not so something else is. It just is. Life by itself, is what is and it is not a thought to give it worth or approval.

That then is saying The Dickensian echo isn’t played for a ego or thought to approve. It is just so it is, as it is.

The Inner Divide

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How many ways is it going to be vocalized, the concept of duality. You don’t need to consider non duality, for if there is duality it has to be a reflection of something. That is what allows either to be. Other wise space is all there is. We tend to think of space as something. As though it is a reflection of something. That idea is a manifestation of mind. As mind needs to think and it only can think in reflection to something else.

Innately the mind thinks one but one doesn’t exist as one is compared to something else in mind. One outside mind is nothing. It’s space that never ends, never begins. It isn’t made of something. There are no electrons, protons, neutrons, no gasses, no atoms. No dirt, decay.

The mind can’t think that though. It has to think it in a reflection. To “think” space, mind has to think, the invisible chalkboard, that gives chalk a surface to mark. A canvass that isn’t that allows the artist to create.

What’s the something that duality is a reflection of? You can throws stones at how the two dance with each other for eternity with words that never touch it.

Plato, Socrates, Galileo, The Pope, Mohhamed, Christ, Buddha, you and I. None of us say it better then another. We want to think one does more then the other because the mind needs a ruler, a beginning and a end. If however Space or Nothing is the concept, it has no source, no thought that can hold it or show it so anyone who is pointing at nothing can’t show it more then another. As who or what is closer to infinity?  Who gets to the finish line first when there is no end? So the ability to be of no mind is the object of reflection that is never. It isn’t and because it isn’t what is can be.

CARRY ON

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Another one of those times were you feel like giving up and your just counting days. Your tired of seeing yourself on some Etch A Sketch so you don’t have to feel the pain of your thoughts.
You feel like you have the bullets and the gun but no matter how hard, dedicated and patient you are, you still can’t hit the center or even the target.
Trying to find the sun and the moon in today as a thought that’s going to be my tomorrow , is past the idea of getting old.
The idea of checking out, be it a cardboard box or a knife in your heart doesn’t seem to mean to much
Trying to bring it home and cross the finish line so someone else won’t give up is a motto that today isn’t filling my cup
That thinking wants to stir the pot like it somehow has the answer if I look hard enough yet the idea of digging deep isnt doing much to soothe my aching feet.
So I look at the mess laying at my feet in thoughts that I don’t want to touch but I still pick them up and put them in a sack and throw’em over my shoulder as I know  I can’t deny them or push them away and somehow that worn out credo of acceptance of today is the key to a new way, makes sense but it feels like wearing three day old socks
So this to shall pass and with it may come a fake smile to pretend today is okay.
Live for another day and don’t give up. If for nothing else I can sit here now and feel helpless but carry on just so I can be here tomorrow to see a new dawn.image

Thoughtless

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You know what’s difficult for all of us, whether we lean or stand to the right or the left, is being willing to allow our beliefs to be challenged. Most of us are unconsciously focused on defending our beliefs. The idea that we don’t have a concrete thought of what we think we are is THOUGHT of as being weak. That idea is in us. It’s part of our making. We are broken and in a thought we want to cover that broken or fix the broken with a thought. We tend to immortalize thoughts by calling them beliefs as though the thought now is not some aberration of mind but instead it’s REAL. It’s who I am. “I” all of a sudden becomes omnipotent because the thought is now a belief and the bedrock that was once my “broken” is now fixed by a Belief.
As “I” holds onto that bedrock belief it no longer sees itself as broken. Instead it looks at The Belief as proof of who it is.
So now the foundation of our brokenness is replaced by our mind. Our mind is never complacent. It constantly needs to think itself, as it thinks it is. And if it thinks it is, then not to think is the death of itself. The mind doesn’t want to die. The mind needs to keep thinking in order to survive and it does that by controlling us. So as we continue to think who we are, we add to that first thought we put over our broken. That first thought is smothered and combined with a life time of thoughts, the mind, continues to think in order to survive.

The mind lives in fear of losing control and dying and it does we live our life with a false foundation. The initial fear of who we think we are is covered with countless band aides of thought. We defend those band aides as who we are and it’s our fear of not allowing ourselves to be challenged in what we think that separates us from the broken. The broken is the connection of us to our true self and as we cover the broken with our beliefs/thoughts, that give us a false security based in fear. That is how we separate our self from the God of our making to the thought of a God we think is but it isn’t. We just think it is.
So the idea that the truth will set us free isn’t the belief or a thought of knowing God. It’s the willingness to embrace our fear of thinking God and in that Letting Go a awareness that supercedes anything we can know will Be.
Those dominos of thought that separate us from the unbridled intelligence of God can begin to fall and we either can spend a life letting them fall one by one and setting us free on a step by step basis or they can all fall at once and as they all fall at once that is a vision of eternity, the alpha and the omega, the beginning that never ends. The moment that isn’t trapped in time by a thought that thinks it.

It is because it is, not because some pretense of ego or “I” thinks it is.

 
“Little drops of rain whisper of the pain, tears of loves lost in the days gone by.
My love is strong, with you there is no wrong,
together we shall go until we die. My, my, my.
An inspiration is what you are to me, inspiration, look… see. And so today, my world it smiles, your hand in mine, we walk the miles,
Thanks to you it will be done, for you to me are the only one.
Happiness, no more be sad, happiness….I’m glad.
If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you.
When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me” Zeppelinimage

The place I Am

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It’s nice to believe in something that gives you hope. It’s comforting to see things that give you hope.
What’s truly empowering is turning hope into a reality by being able to see how to apply yourself in a way that gives you a formula to achieve your hope.
If we choose to believe life happens for a reason, then we are telling ourself that we are meant to be exactly were we are. When we embrace that concept we then look at Now as having a purpose for us regardless of how Now appears to us. That in turn changes our perception of Now from a judgement of our mind, in a thought. ie. This is good or this is bad to something more then the limits of what we think.
If we look then at how we are thinking the present moment or Now, we then let go of the boxes of thought we are living in by defining Now and instead realize we don’t know Now.
By doing that, Now is teaching us. So that then let’s us humble our mind to a student and not a teacher. We then see everything as a opportunity and our pain and our suffering are no longer as they appeared to us.
“What if we are not helping life but instead life is helping us. Then our bad wouldn’t seem so negative and our good wouldn’t have a conventional meaning anymore”
That whole paradigm I outlined is a choice. If you choose to agree with that then you are saying yes to a action of responding to life.
If you disagree with that paradigm then you are choosing to not respond to life from consciousness but instead react to life subconsciously by what you think.
If you look into most any religion and not be stuck on a thought you think you know religion in, you will see that nothing is as it seems. That is the path to our salvation.
We look to let go of what we think to discover a intelligence that is beyond our understanding.image

Between

Understanding this anatomy isn’t important to relating to what I am pointing at. The physiology is not either. If you see the interaction though of the anatomy and the mechanisms the physiology is responsible for, you will see what I’m trying to convey.
The neocortex or the new brain as it is referenced as because it plays a major role in the cognitive differences between man and other mammals and is newer in the chronological development of man separates us from other mammals. The four lobes of the neocortex are the frontal, parietal temporal and occipital and they encompass the surface of the brain and surround the underlying Limbic system which in turn envelop the medulla oblongata and the brain stem.
The Limbic system is shaped like a donut. It rests above the brain stem or the reptilian brain which infers to its primal functions.
This is a very simple appreciation for displaying cognitive function in the brain. The anatomy is daunting to look at in whole. I am simply pointing at certain structures that are part of a bigger community of anatomy that play a role in our emotional make up.
The following are some of the anatomy found in the Limbic system that I single out as they are significant to the topic of mental health and some of the things they are responsible for: the hypothalamus plays a role in feeling exhilarated, angry or unhappy. The amygdala which plays a role in emotional responses, the cingulate gyrus plays a role in regulation of aggressive behavior, the hippocampus plays a role in regulating hormones dealing with arousal and mental focus.
There are areas that specifically correlate to the interaction between the neocortex and the Limbic system which infers they both play a role in the emotions we feel and the actions we do or don’t do that because of the emotions we feel. There are other areas of anatomy in the Limbic system that play a role in objective and subjective capabilities which reference the concept of actually being aware of whether you insult someone or compliment someone by your behavior ie the observing ego.
It is known through magnetic resonance imaging MRI that the Limbic system the frontal lobes along with other areas of the brain interact with each other and have pathways designed to communicate feelings of shame, guilt, remorse. Our ability or inability to perceive those emotions in a normal way, exaggerated way, depressed way or not at all are simply because of the development of certain brain anatomy or damaged in the Limbic system. Their is also the effects of neuro modulators (Acetylcholine) and neurotransmitters (dopamine) that are effected in ways that alter the proper use of them in the brain. They exaggerate or diminish feelings or behavior.
What I’m about to point at is some fact and some projection.
The Limbic system is molded or developed in our childhood from the examples we incur mostly from parental figures. This is a bedrock, so to say, that is part of the foundation of our psyche. The frontal lobe is molded also from our childhood but the ability to manipulate that area of emotion and action is more easily demonstrated then the emotions from the Limbic system. If you think of the Frontal Lobe as conscious thought and the Limbic system as subconscious thought you can visualize what I’m saying.
We then use our frontal lobe as away of navigating through the superficial challenges we face in day to day living. We may be upset but we don’t let that effect us or we over ride those feelings to better serve ourself.
However when we are confronted with situations that trigger emotions from the Limbic system they have a stronger hold on us. The are close to the primal instincts of the reptilian brain or the brain stem which controls vital functions like breathing, heart rate and so on. We can feel the restraint of the temporal lobe decision making when we are struggling with our emotions but the engrained pattern on our Limbic system from our childhood will win that arm wrestle or tug of war between the two.
So as someone who has had proper childhood and has a Limbic function predicated on a “normal” or functional childhood will react completely different then the adult raised in a traumatic childhood or dysfunctional childhood.
The self will of restraint seems not so much a mechanism of choice in this light but a matter of childhood construction centered around the ability to use coping mechanisms centered around socially acceptable means or the destructive or counter productive measures hidden in the childhood development of a Limbic system.
With any appreciation of that information, you may say or think “what is the point”.

If you can see how in order to deal with individuals who have antisocial behavior the challenge is not using incarceration of feelings of guilt on the frontal lobe as way of changing behavior. It is more a matter of understanding how to address the Limbic system in rehabilitation .
The Limbic system experiencing a genisis or a plasty, ie growth or repair not by a verbal or thinking action. It’s done through a visual axiom that is a process of group therapy which can be found in any 12 step program or therapeutic practice.
What is most prevalent though is identifying the area of retarded growth in the individual and using a visual technique that will demonstrate the specific area of behavior. Diagnosis of that behavior is important in using the correct visual techniques in repairing it. Other wise you are gambling on the possibility of chance in the correct area damaged being addressed in a group therapy.
There could also can be specific video formats derived to treat certain anomalies of behavior with a visual of the correct behavior.
If you can see this mechanism of addressing mental health you then can see how the visual a religion affords through the bible, Christs time on earth. The Bhagavad Ghita and so on offer specific visual demonstrations to cater to a wounded mind and help it heal itself in a visual demonstration of religion. A important concept to encompass this treatment is not only is diagnosis extremely valuable but repetition is imperative.
The Limbic system can be repaired in both religious, spiritual and science.
#4) will be about using spirituality and quantum physics to heal or create growth in the Limbic system