. It can be quite easy to undervalue or overvalue yourself and when you are on either side of that juggernaut the opposite side of that perspective is quite easily ignored.
To tell a narscistic ego driven mind to let go of that and move toward a more humble residing is looked at from the narscissist perspectiveas a insult. Where as someone who suffers from a lack of self confidence and dejected self perspective sees the advice from someone to embrace themself with a sense of confidence and self appreciation is taken in a manor that makes them feel like they do not deserve it and it comes across to them as being intangible and a empty compliment.
Finding a solution to the problem is a matter of awareness and that change of awareness usually comes to us in a manner that is looked at as being “bad”. Our awareness unfolds to us in life in a way though, that often is hidden in the experience of what seems like defeat. So the narcissistic feeling a sense of being rejected is the making of his perceived problem being a stepping stone to humility. For the person who lacks confidence or a somewhat useful narcissism, the challenge in life’s hurdles creates the struggle to achieve which is the pathway for a sense of accomplishment which in turn creates self confidence. So in looking at the two it’s easy to see how the antidote for one type of perspective is the poison that creates the other, humility/confidence.
A sense of moderation of either is needed to deal with life in a functional way that serves our material world and the spiritual side of us. Finding that moderation in us is not a simple process as it is our thinking that creates the lack of moderation and attempting to look at how you think is not as simple as it appears. It is a burden of our making.
“Close your eyes and bow your head, I need a little sympathy, cause fear is strong and love’s for everyone, who isn’t me. So kill your health and kill yourself, and kill everything you love. And if you live you can fall to peaces and suffer with my ghost. Just a burden in my hand. Just a anchor on my heart. Just a tumor in my head. And I’m in the dark” Sound Garden, Burden In My Hand.
So the riddle of solution to the egomaniac or the defeatistis is hidden in the initial creation of either perspective which is the childhood development. So either personality type is the child in the adult reacting to life and observing ourself in that way we can see the actions in a objective manner as being childish, that objective perspective can allows to use the appropriate antidote to heal ourself and not allow the feelings created in our childhood to control us. Objectively seeing ourself in that manner allows us to treat those foundational building blocks with in us.
That foundation of personality is built on the bedrock of our identity. Replacing or reshaping that bedrock is not a simple task and it becomes much more practical to see the goal as a work in progress. That outlook of achievement is the something that gives the undervalued ego a feeling of accomplishment that builds self worth and the egomaniac a sense of seeing their glaring self confidence in a dimmer light.
It is not until we find a way to see life outside the box of good and bad that we are given the tools we need to escape our own limitations. It is that challenge of the ego finding a way to see the good in the bad and the bad in the good that develops a pathway for either to help themself.
Much like The Wizard of Oz and how the Tin Man, The Scarecrow, The Lion and Dorothy all found the answers to their problems in their journey, so do we in our journey. The path of our life is the destination. We are were we need to be.
“Where you are is the starting point” Kabir